Questions To Ask When Choosing A Doula
By: Ollie Strong Birth & Postpartum Doula
Hiring a doula is one of the most personal and important choices you’ll ever make during your pregnancy. After all, this person is going to be by your side during one of the most intense, transformative, and emotional moments of your life.
So how do you know if a doula is the right fit for you?
These 5 questions will help you feel confident, empowered, and clear when choosing the support you need and deserve.
1.What Is Your Approach to Birth Support?
Every doula has their own unique style. Some are hands on with massage, counter pressure, and movement. While others might focus more on emotional support and guidance. Some doulas are more laid back; others can be very structured.
Why this matters: You want the doula whose vibe matches your own. If you're hoping for a calm, grounding presence but your doula is high energy and directive it may not feel aligned.
Pro Tip: Ask for examples of how they’ve supported clients in different kinds of births.
2. What Services Do You Offer Before, During, and After Birth?
Doulas often provide more than just labor support. Prenatal visits, postpartum care, lactation help, and text/phone support can all be part of the package.
Why this matters: You want to know exactly what kind of support you’ll receive and when. A doula who checks in after birth can be just as available as the one holding your hand during labor.
Pro Tip: Ask about backup doulas and availability around your due date.
3. How Do You Support Partners And Families During Birth?
Doulas don’t replace your partner- they enhance their experience too. A good doula will make your partner feel supported, informed, and confident in their role.
Why this matters: You want someone who respects your birth team and strengthens your whole support system.
This is a good sign: If they mention who they empower your partner to feel involved, you’re likely in good hands.
4. What Kind Of Births Have You Supported?
Ask about their experience with hospital births, home births, c-sections, epidurals, unmedicated births, and anything else that may apply.
Why this matters: You want someone who’s comfortable and experienced in your type of birth setting, not just one kind.
Bonus Tip: If you have special circumstances ( BAC, high risk, trauma informed needs), this is the time to talk about it.
5. What Makes You Passionate About Birthwork?
This is where you’ll really get a sense of their “why”. You're not just hiring someone with a resume- you're inviting someone into your sacred birth space.
Why this matters: Connection is everything. You want to feel safe, seen, and supported.
Trust Your Gut: After this question, you’ll know if the doula feels right.
Choosing a doula isn't about picking the most experienced person- it's about finding someone who truly gets you, honors your wishes, and supports your vision for birth. Ask these 5 questions during your consultations, and don’t be afraid to keep looking until it feels right.
Are You Looking For A Doula?
Let's talk. I’m here for the messy, beautiful, and everything in between.
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